A Happy Heart
March 3, 2009 by wardnl
Yesterday I was holding Micah, and singing to him. Now, my voice isn’t American Idol quality, and I’m totally off key, but Micah didn’t seem to notice or care. He stared at me with his almond shaped blue eyes in awe and amazement! Before I started to sing to him, my heart was heavy and a little sad. I was wondering what his life would be like as he grew older, I wondered when would he walk, talk, give me kisses. These were all things I never had to think about with my other 3 children. Maybe I should have thought about those things with the others, because I can barley remember them and that is sad. So as those thoughts swirled in my mind, my heart was clouded with a little sadness, as I realized that this child would bring something different to my life, something I don’t have any experience with. Then like a rainbow that comes after a storm, when I was singing to Micah, he smiled and cooed, as if to say,” Mom, its going to be okay.” It made him happy as I sang to him, and it made me happy to sing to him. I had a revelation in my heart! As a christian, we praise God with songs. It says in the bible he delights in our praises. Just like Micah, God doesn’t care if we are off key, tone deaf, or down right terrible singers. He looks at us like Micah looked at me, and is delighted, pleased, in awe and in love with who we are, and the sweet aroma of our voices. We don’t always have to have all the directions, and that’s okay. It is amazing how this child who has down syndrome has been used by God to touch my life and others. I say this with full confidence that the face and heart of God is reflected in the face of children with Down Syndrome and other disabilities. When you don’t feel like singing, sing anyway, and ask God to but a new song in your heart. My life and Micah’s life is in God’s hands.. and those are the best hands to be in. A simple song sang to my child, cleared the clouds around my heart, and now my heart is happy….
wardnl
Hi. Thanks for the post. I agree there are some mixed feelings when raising a child with down syndrome. Thinking about my own experiences, I also am curious and nervous about what the future will bring but I find myself enjoying and noticing every little accomplishment which leads me to believe that this is providing a very special, rich experience that I will treasure always.
It is wonderful that your faith inspires and comforts you so. I personally am not a religious person but I can relate to this sense of tranquility and calmness that I experience when I’m with Teddy, my wife, and my two other boys. I think many others that visit this site and read your posts appreciate all that you do and I hope they all have similar instruments to help them see the wonderful things their children bring to their lives.
Thanks for sharing and I look forward to reading more of your thoughts and would love to see some pictures.
Justin
That was a really beautiful article to read….
I wish in my heart that i could feel the same way you feel
i would love to be able to touch my childrens face and have the chance to sing in there ears, you have been very blessed with this child…..
Check out the book, “Theology and Down Syndrome,” by Amos Young. Although it is a bit scholarly I still found it fascinating. congratulations on the birth of your son. I have a daughter with DS.
Hi, nice posts there
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